An outsider’s observation...
In the Western world, you have to be an unusual kind of person to want to live polygynously, especially if you are a woman. In my experience, there are three kind of women who are willing to toss aside tradition in favor of the onslaught of pressures that you are certain to face as a polygynist.
Desperate. Some women have already faced some of the worst the world has to offer and are willing to face a little bit more in order to find the relief that comes with family and love. They don’t think very far ahead, living one day at a time without great regard for consequence.
Sick. Some women (some men, too, but that’s another article) love to destroy other people’s lives, especially their own. They weasel their way into families by feigning submission and gentleness, and then turn on the very people who have opened their homes, tearing down husbands and driving other wives away. If they aren’t interested in polygamy, you’ll find them as mistresses, one-night stands, bitter and angry. Patriarchy in action (sometimes the mere mention of it) sends them into fits of rage. They often make claims of strength, when they are anything but.
Free. Some women are open to polygyny because they are simply open. They don’t base life choices on what everyone else does. They choose what seems right to them, and not what others tell them is right. They are usually strong, secure, and intelligent. Some of these women started in the same way as the desperate women, but they responded differently. Their hardships drove them to freedom instead of to desperation. They rarely have a need for polygyny and neither do their husbands.
The desperate woman and the sick woman are likely to poison all their relationships with men, intentionally or not. The desperate woman should be handled with caution. Her perspective on life is seriously skewed, and she has propensities for selfishness and instability. You are likely to spend all of your time propping her up, instead of working together to build a family and ministry. The sick woman should be avoided at all costs. Her risks far outweigh her benefits, which are few and mostly fallacious. She will destroy your life and the lives of everyone else who gets close to her. Both of these two are also likely to be Jezebels, controlling and manipulative.
The free woman is every great man’s dream. If you are worth her time and you do your part, then your synergy will be amazing. Whatever you decide to do, you are likely to exceed everyone around you. If she puts her energy into becoming a great woman, then she will be a ruby set in pure gold.
Showing posts with label Polygamy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Polygamy. Show all posts
Pride, Fear, & Polygamophobia
Eloquent as ever, Mizazeez wrote,
Our culture’s monogamous, polygamophobic dogma relieves wives of a large part of this battle. It tells them that it is OK to surrender to Jezebel in this one area. “It’s OK to rule your husband in this way,” it says, “because you’re equal.” Never mind the inherent contradiction of ruling an equal, and never mind that this one surrender gives the enemy a beachhead by which he can conquer the whole woman. Likewise, it tells men that they are perverts or domineering control freaks if they ever feel the slightest desire for another woman or if they entertain even a thought that the other woman might be a good addition to his family. Wives build a fortress of pride and indignation around this little kingdom and hold it over their husbands’ heads, constantly threatening and manipulating.
There are three evidences that this jealously guarded fortress is actually territory surrendered to fear.
First, godly women are to follow the examples of the Hebrew matriarchs, Sarah, Rebekah, Leah, and Rachel, in their relationships with their husbands. Three of those four women insisted on sharing their husbands with other women. While they were still motivated by fear or jealousy, those motivations led them to surrender more control to their husbands.
Second, most women would sooner tolerate multiple, temporary, and adulterous affairs than share their husband with a second wife. Not only does promiscuity put her husband’s soul at risk, but it puts both of them at risk of disease. Despite recent propaganda to the contrary, polygyny is no more conducive to the spread of disease than is monogamy. Women will tolerate sin and death before considering true submission.
Third, wives who are otherwise submissive and honorable are likely to enter an immediate rage at the prospect of a second wife. They will give in to the urge to hate, lie, and abuse, but will not give in to their husbands.
These are not characteristics of righteousness and love, but of fear and pride. They are only and thoroughly evil.
i suppose my struggle has never been with polygyny in general. i suppose my struggle was more personal. my husband taking another wife triggered pre-existing insecurities and animosity that would have surfaced at some other time due to some other circumstance had my husband not had polygynous endeavors.That is true in almost everything. Our problems are almost always of our own making. Our attitudes–our baggage–are behind almost every human conflict. God created men and women to be married in a particular relationship to one another, and it is not a relationship of equal partners. In Genesis 3:16 God told women (via Eve) that they will be in an eternal struggle against their pride and drive to rule their husbands. That is the true patriarchal curse of Eve, not that she would be ruled by her husband, but that she and all of her descendants would each have to battle and defeat their own Jezebel in order to be content in life as God meant it to be lived. This desire is like (perhaps more than “like”) a living creature, and it must be fought as such.
Our culture’s monogamous, polygamophobic dogma relieves wives of a large part of this battle. It tells them that it is OK to surrender to Jezebel in this one area. “It’s OK to rule your husband in this way,” it says, “because you’re equal.” Never mind the inherent contradiction of ruling an equal, and never mind that this one surrender gives the enemy a beachhead by which he can conquer the whole woman. Likewise, it tells men that they are perverts or domineering control freaks if they ever feel the slightest desire for another woman or if they entertain even a thought that the other woman might be a good addition to his family. Wives build a fortress of pride and indignation around this little kingdom and hold it over their husbands’ heads, constantly threatening and manipulating.
There are three evidences that this jealously guarded fortress is actually territory surrendered to fear.
First, godly women are to follow the examples of the Hebrew matriarchs, Sarah, Rebekah, Leah, and Rachel, in their relationships with their husbands. Three of those four women insisted on sharing their husbands with other women. While they were still motivated by fear or jealousy, those motivations led them to surrender more control to their husbands.
Second, most women would sooner tolerate multiple, temporary, and adulterous affairs than share their husband with a second wife. Not only does promiscuity put her husband’s soul at risk, but it puts both of them at risk of disease. Despite recent propaganda to the contrary, polygyny is no more conducive to the spread of disease than is monogamy. Women will tolerate sin and death before considering true submission.
Third, wives who are otherwise submissive and honorable are likely to enter an immediate rage at the prospect of a second wife. They will give in to the urge to hate, lie, and abuse, but will not give in to their husbands.
These are not characteristics of righteousness and love, but of fear and pride. They are only and thoroughly evil.
Euro-crites
From the Salt Lake Tribune, "Turkish polygamists start to rethink the outlawed practice":
This is one example of what I posted about a few weeks ago. Western Europe looks down on Turkey because many Turks are polygamists, but they complain that outlawing adultery would be wrong (even after redefining adultery to include sex with your own wives). That would interfere with the right of “monogamous” men to have sex with the wives of other “monogamous” men, and we can’t have that!
"The EU is looking for any excuse not to let Turkey in, and polygamy reinforces the stereotype of Turkey as a backward country," said Handan Coskun, director of a women’s center….Two years ago, Prime Minister Tayyip Recep Erdogan tried to attack polygamy by criminalizing adultery, after prominent members of his Justice and Development Party were rumored to have taken second wives. But even though it condemns polygamy, the European Union criticized him for intervening in the nation’s bedrooms, leading him to back down.
This is one example of what I posted about a few weeks ago. Western Europe looks down on Turkey because many Turks are polygamists, but they complain that outlawing adultery would be wrong (even after redefining adultery to include sex with your own wives). That would interfere with the right of “monogamous” men to have sex with the wives of other “monogamous” men, and we can’t have that!
Terms of Biblical Sexuality
Very few people seem to understand the meaning of these words. I think a brief dictionary of Biblical sexuality is in order. The definitions here are based on Biblical usage, and these words may be defined differently in law or other texts. Most of the words in this list are not used in the Bible at all, but I have included them anyway, because they are useful in discussing Biblical topics.
Adultery - Any sexual act between a married woman and a man who is not her husband. Every use of the Hebrew and Greek terms for adultery refers to a man with another man's wife. It might be immoral for a married man to have sex with an unmarried woman, but it is not adultery according to Biblical usage.
Bestiality - Any sexual act between a person and an animal. Biblical law requires the death of both the person and the animal.
Betrothal - Agreement to a future marriage. In the Bible a betrothal is as binding as marriage. The rapist of a betrothed woman receives the same punishment as the rapist of a married woman: death. The rapist of an unbetrothed virgin receives a heavy financial penalty.
Bill of Divorcement - A document given by a husband to a divorced wife to prove that she has been lawfully divorced.
Bride-price - Something of value usually given to the father or family of a woman in exchange for her marriage. Sometimes the bride-price might be given to the woman. In ancient Hebrew culture, if a bride-price is given without receiving a dowry, then the woman would become a concubine. She would be a wife, but would also have been purchased, making her a slave. See dowry.
Consanguinogamy - Marriage to relatives who are not Biblically forbidden. Cousin and uncle/niece marriages are consanguinogamous.
Divorce - The dissolution of a marriage by repudiation or abandonment. See putting away and bill of divorcement.
Dowry - Something of value brought into a marriage by a woman. Usually it consisted of property given to the husband by the bride's family. It might be reserved for use by the woman and might return to her family if she is divorced. See bride-price.
Endogamy - Marriage within one's own social group, clan, or tribe.
Exogamy - Marriage outside of one's own social group, clan, or tribe.
Fornication - Any sexually immoral act. Fornication includes adultery, homosexuality, bestiality, prostitution, incest, etc.
Harlotry - Prostitution or sex for pay.
Homosexuality - See lesbianism and sodomy.
Incest - Sexual relations with a close relative. Sexual relations with any of the following persons would be incest: parents, children, siblings, grandparents, grandchildren, aunts, nephews. Marriage to cousins, uncles, and nieces might be considered incestuous in modern, Western cultures, but they are not forbidden in the Bible.
Lesbianism - Female homosexuality. Alluded to once by Paul, but otherwise is not specifically addressed in the Bible.
Levirate - The practice of a surviving male relative--usually a brother--marrying the childless widow of the deceased. The purpose was to ensure the continuity of inheritance by providing the deceased with an heir in the firstborn of the new marriage. If a man had several wives and at least one of them had children, then the law of the levirate would not apply.
Marriage - A permanent union between a man and a woman, consummated by sexual relations. I do not believe that the sexual union in itself constitutes marriage. It must be accompanied by an agreement of permanency between the marrying individuals, and the consent, whether implicit or explicit, of the woman's guardian if she is not a widow or divorcee.
Onanism - Male masturbation or "pulling out" to prevent conception. Named for Onan, the son of Judah, because he was killed by God for spilling his seed on the ground to avoid giving his deceased brother an heir according to the levirate. I believe that the term is misnamed and misapplied, because Onan was not killed for spilling his seed, but for denying his brother an heir. It might be more appropriate to apply the term to the modern aversion to the levirate and to onerous inheritance taxes.
Polyandry - A more or less permanent sexual relationship established between one woman and more than one man. A form of polygamy that is not allowed by Biblical laws.
Polygamy - A more or less permanent sexual relationship established between one person and multiple persons of the opposite sex. Bigamy (one person with only two persons of the opposite sex), polyandry (one woman with multiple men), and polygyny (one man with multiple women) are sub-categories of polygamy.
Polygyny - A more or less permanent sexual relationship established between one man and more than one woman. A form of polygamy that is allowed by Biblical laws.
Putting Away - Repudiation and physical removal of a spouse, almost always of a wife by her husband. See divorce.
Sodomy - Male homosexuality, especially homosexual prostitution or ritual homosexuality. All male sodomy is clearly condemned in the Bible, which prescribes the death penalty for all sodomites.
Sororal Polygyny - The marriage of one man to two sisters, as in the case of Jacob with Leah and Rachel. Prohibited by Leviticus 18:18, but the prohibition might be limited to situations in which the second marriage is likely to cause a great deal of strain on the first, for example if the sisters are already hostile or very competitive toward one another. Could also be called "sororal polygamy."
Whoredom - Pretty much the same as fornication. Whoredom might imply prostitution or illicit heterosexual activity as opposed to other forms of fornication.
Adultery - Any sexual act between a married woman and a man who is not her husband. Every use of the Hebrew and Greek terms for adultery refers to a man with another man's wife. It might be immoral for a married man to have sex with an unmarried woman, but it is not adultery according to Biblical usage.
Bestiality - Any sexual act between a person and an animal. Biblical law requires the death of both the person and the animal.
Betrothal - Agreement to a future marriage. In the Bible a betrothal is as binding as marriage. The rapist of a betrothed woman receives the same punishment as the rapist of a married woman: death. The rapist of an unbetrothed virgin receives a heavy financial penalty.
Bill of Divorcement - A document given by a husband to a divorced wife to prove that she has been lawfully divorced.
Bride-price - Something of value usually given to the father or family of a woman in exchange for her marriage. Sometimes the bride-price might be given to the woman. In ancient Hebrew culture, if a bride-price is given without receiving a dowry, then the woman would become a concubine. She would be a wife, but would also have been purchased, making her a slave. See dowry.
Consanguinogamy - Marriage to relatives who are not Biblically forbidden. Cousin and uncle/niece marriages are consanguinogamous.
Divorce - The dissolution of a marriage by repudiation or abandonment. See putting away and bill of divorcement.
Dowry - Something of value brought into a marriage by a woman. Usually it consisted of property given to the husband by the bride's family. It might be reserved for use by the woman and might return to her family if she is divorced. See bride-price.
Endogamy - Marriage within one's own social group, clan, or tribe.
Exogamy - Marriage outside of one's own social group, clan, or tribe.
Fornication - Any sexually immoral act. Fornication includes adultery, homosexuality, bestiality, prostitution, incest, etc.
Harlotry - Prostitution or sex for pay.
Homosexuality - See lesbianism and sodomy.
Incest - Sexual relations with a close relative. Sexual relations with any of the following persons would be incest: parents, children, siblings, grandparents, grandchildren, aunts, nephews. Marriage to cousins, uncles, and nieces might be considered incestuous in modern, Western cultures, but they are not forbidden in the Bible.
Lesbianism - Female homosexuality. Alluded to once by Paul, but otherwise is not specifically addressed in the Bible.
Levirate - The practice of a surviving male relative--usually a brother--marrying the childless widow of the deceased. The purpose was to ensure the continuity of inheritance by providing the deceased with an heir in the firstborn of the new marriage. If a man had several wives and at least one of them had children, then the law of the levirate would not apply.
Marriage - A permanent union between a man and a woman, consummated by sexual relations. I do not believe that the sexual union in itself constitutes marriage. It must be accompanied by an agreement of permanency between the marrying individuals, and the consent, whether implicit or explicit, of the woman's guardian if she is not a widow or divorcee.
Onanism - Male masturbation or "pulling out" to prevent conception. Named for Onan, the son of Judah, because he was killed by God for spilling his seed on the ground to avoid giving his deceased brother an heir according to the levirate. I believe that the term is misnamed and misapplied, because Onan was not killed for spilling his seed, but for denying his brother an heir. It might be more appropriate to apply the term to the modern aversion to the levirate and to onerous inheritance taxes.
Polyandry - A more or less permanent sexual relationship established between one woman and more than one man. A form of polygamy that is not allowed by Biblical laws.
Polygamy - A more or less permanent sexual relationship established between one person and multiple persons of the opposite sex. Bigamy (one person with only two persons of the opposite sex), polyandry (one woman with multiple men), and polygyny (one man with multiple women) are sub-categories of polygamy.
Polygyny - A more or less permanent sexual relationship established between one man and more than one woman. A form of polygamy that is allowed by Biblical laws.
Putting Away - Repudiation and physical removal of a spouse, almost always of a wife by her husband. See divorce.
Sodomy - Male homosexuality, especially homosexual prostitution or ritual homosexuality. All male sodomy is clearly condemned in the Bible, which prescribes the death penalty for all sodomites.
Sororal Polygyny - The marriage of one man to two sisters, as in the case of Jacob with Leah and Rachel. Prohibited by Leviticus 18:18, but the prohibition might be limited to situations in which the second marriage is likely to cause a great deal of strain on the first, for example if the sisters are already hostile or very competitive toward one another. Could also be called "sororal polygamy."
Whoredom - Pretty much the same as fornication. Whoredom might imply prostitution or illicit heterosexual activity as opposed to other forms of fornication.
Is Polygamy Always a Bad Idea
There are three main schools of bible-based thought regarding whether polygamy is a good or bad idea. The first, which hardly qualifies as a school of thought, says that women were created for the pleasure of men, and that men may use them or not as they please. The second says that men and women were created as equals and polygamy always leads to trouble. The third says that polygamy may not be the way that people will usually live, but that it may be appropriate and healthy under some circumstances.
While it may be true that women were created for the benefit of men (Gen 2:18, 1 Cor 11:9), it is not true that men may do whatever they please with their wives. Paul reminded us that without women, none of us would even exist (1 Cor 11:11-12). He also wrote that men are to love their wives as Christ loved the Church. That means that we men should be willing to give up everything, even to our own lives, for the sake of our wives (Eph 5:25). We are to follow the example of Christ's daily life also, and it is clear that he treated women with the same respect with which he treated men.
We shouldn't go to the opposite extreme, either, acting as if men and women are exactly equal in all things. The Hebrew behind the term, help-meet, is ezer kenegdo, which literally means "a suitable helper or support." That term doesn't necessarily presuppose anything of authority or rank between Adam and Eve. Moses refers to God with the same word for helper, ezer (Exo 18:4, Deu 33:7, Deu 33:29). However, there is a fundamental difference between God and Eve. God chooses to be a helper at times to mankind, while Eve was created specifically to support Adam. As Paul pointed out, Eve's subordination to Adam did not begin at the Fall, but was inherent in her creation (1 Cor 11:9, 1 Tim 2:13) and evidenced by her character and mission prior to the Fall (1 Tim 2:14-15). There are other aspects of the Creation that demonstrate Adams original authority over Eve, such as the source of Eve's substance, her presentation to Adam, and her naming by Adam. Men and women are not equal in all ways. Husbands have authority over their wives in the same way that Christ has authority over the Church. While Christ willingly made himself a servant and sacrificed his own life for the Church's, there is absolutely no question that he maintains absolute authority. He doesn't force us into his will, but he makes it clear that we are expected to obey him anyway. "If you love me, keep my commandments," he said. Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the Church. Wives, obey your husbands as the Church obeys Christ.
Polygamy is obviously not a sin. There is no commandment against it in Scripture. God's best men were often polygamists and they were never reprimanded for it. In fact, God allegorically calls himself a polygamist (Jer 3:6-10, Jer 31:31-32), and claims to have rewarded David with multiple wives (2 Sam 12:8). If polygamy always caused more harm than good, then it would be a clear violation of the command to love your neighbor as yourself. Surely God would have said something about it if that were true. He isn't afraid of men that he needs to be polite and tolerant of their sins. The Israelites who came out of Egypt were polygamous (Num 3:39,43,46) and idolatrous (Exo 32:1-26). Yet God chose to kill thousands of them for their idolatry (Exo 32:28), while giving advice on how to conduct their polygamy (Deu 21:15-17). If polygamy is not always a bad thing, then it follows that it must sometimes be a good thing.
In our fallen world, there is sickness, death, war, rebellion, hatred, and foolishness.
Yeshua and Paul said that all women should normally marry, but that there are some men who will not, and some men that should not (Mat 19:12, 1 Cor 7:25-28, 1 Tim 2:15, 1 Tim 5:9-16). The birth rates of men and women are essentially equal, and in a perfect world there would be no war and no terribly dangerous work, with the result that there would be only slightly more marriable women than men. There would be no unbelievers, and therefore no need to worry about being unequally yoked. In a perfect world, a few men would have to be polygamous in order to provide husbands for all women. But in a fallen world, war, crime, and hard labor mean that men die young much more often than do women. Making matters worse, more men than women are unbelievers. That means that in order to marry a godly man, sometimes a woman must settle for someone less desirable, steal a man from another woman, or become a spinster. None of those options is compatible with God's Law. Men don't have to be or do anything special to attract a wife, because women come cheaply. Women have to resort to marketing themselves in order to attract any attention, and we all know that sex sells. Those women who, through no fault of their own, hold no special attraction for men, have no real hope of a happy and fulfilling life, because there is no reason for any man to pay attention to them.
Polygamy can address many of those problems. A woman wouldn't have to expose herself and act like a whore in order to steal a man from another woman, because the man can be shared. The value of women would increase because there would be fewer of them on the market. Men would then be placed in the position of competing for women instead of the other way around. They would be forced to become better men in order to attract a wife. Plain, infertile, and sickly women would still be able to marry because they don't have to try to be everything that a man needs. Polygamy among godly men can benefit both men and women.
I believe that there are at least two Scriptures which require polygamy among God's people and at least one which calls it a sign of repentance. The law of the levirate at times requires a man to accept a second wife, because it makes no exception for a man who is already married (Deu 25:5-10). Paul commanded younger widows to remarry, and commanded their fellow believers to accommodate them (specifically through financial support, but by implication through finding them a believing husband) (1 Tim 5:9-16), yet he also commanded them to not be unequally yoked with unbelievers (1 Cor 7:39, 2 Cor 6:14). The only way to obey both commands is for some men to marry more than one wife. Isaiah prophesied that in the last days, God's people will be overcome by war, foolishness, and feminism. The first sign of repentance will be when women humble themselves by submitting themselves to godly men who are already married. (Isa 4:1)
Polygamy (by which I mean polygyny and not polyandry or polyamory) is sometimes a very good idea, and sometimes it is necessary for obedience to God.
"If you love me, keep my commandments," Yeshua said.
Addendum: How many verifiably monogamous men are there in the Bible? (By monogamous, I mean according to their status, not their doctrine.) In the strictest sense, we can't verify that anyone in the Bible was monogamous, so lowering the bar to "probably monogamous", off the top of my head I can only think of six, although I’m sure there must be others:
While it may be true that women were created for the benefit of men (Gen 2:18, 1 Cor 11:9), it is not true that men may do whatever they please with their wives. Paul reminded us that without women, none of us would even exist (1 Cor 11:11-12). He also wrote that men are to love their wives as Christ loved the Church. That means that we men should be willing to give up everything, even to our own lives, for the sake of our wives (Eph 5:25). We are to follow the example of Christ's daily life also, and it is clear that he treated women with the same respect with which he treated men.
We shouldn't go to the opposite extreme, either, acting as if men and women are exactly equal in all things. The Hebrew behind the term, help-meet, is ezer kenegdo, which literally means "a suitable helper or support." That term doesn't necessarily presuppose anything of authority or rank between Adam and Eve. Moses refers to God with the same word for helper, ezer (Exo 18:4, Deu 33:7, Deu 33:29). However, there is a fundamental difference between God and Eve. God chooses to be a helper at times to mankind, while Eve was created specifically to support Adam. As Paul pointed out, Eve's subordination to Adam did not begin at the Fall, but was inherent in her creation (1 Cor 11:9, 1 Tim 2:13) and evidenced by her character and mission prior to the Fall (1 Tim 2:14-15). There are other aspects of the Creation that demonstrate Adams original authority over Eve, such as the source of Eve's substance, her presentation to Adam, and her naming by Adam. Men and women are not equal in all ways. Husbands have authority over their wives in the same way that Christ has authority over the Church. While Christ willingly made himself a servant and sacrificed his own life for the Church's, there is absolutely no question that he maintains absolute authority. He doesn't force us into his will, but he makes it clear that we are expected to obey him anyway. "If you love me, keep my commandments," he said. Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the Church. Wives, obey your husbands as the Church obeys Christ.
Polygamy is obviously not a sin. There is no commandment against it in Scripture. God's best men were often polygamists and they were never reprimanded for it. In fact, God allegorically calls himself a polygamist (Jer 3:6-10, Jer 31:31-32), and claims to have rewarded David with multiple wives (2 Sam 12:8). If polygamy always caused more harm than good, then it would be a clear violation of the command to love your neighbor as yourself. Surely God would have said something about it if that were true. He isn't afraid of men that he needs to be polite and tolerant of their sins. The Israelites who came out of Egypt were polygamous (Num 3:39,43,46) and idolatrous (Exo 32:1-26). Yet God chose to kill thousands of them for their idolatry (Exo 32:28), while giving advice on how to conduct their polygamy (Deu 21:15-17). If polygamy is not always a bad thing, then it follows that it must sometimes be a good thing.
In our fallen world, there is sickness, death, war, rebellion, hatred, and foolishness.
Yeshua and Paul said that all women should normally marry, but that there are some men who will not, and some men that should not (Mat 19:12, 1 Cor 7:25-28, 1 Tim 2:15, 1 Tim 5:9-16). The birth rates of men and women are essentially equal, and in a perfect world there would be no war and no terribly dangerous work, with the result that there would be only slightly more marriable women than men. There would be no unbelievers, and therefore no need to worry about being unequally yoked. In a perfect world, a few men would have to be polygamous in order to provide husbands for all women. But in a fallen world, war, crime, and hard labor mean that men die young much more often than do women. Making matters worse, more men than women are unbelievers. That means that in order to marry a godly man, sometimes a woman must settle for someone less desirable, steal a man from another woman, or become a spinster. None of those options is compatible with God's Law. Men don't have to be or do anything special to attract a wife, because women come cheaply. Women have to resort to marketing themselves in order to attract any attention, and we all know that sex sells. Those women who, through no fault of their own, hold no special attraction for men, have no real hope of a happy and fulfilling life, because there is no reason for any man to pay attention to them.
Polygamy can address many of those problems. A woman wouldn't have to expose herself and act like a whore in order to steal a man from another woman, because the man can be shared. The value of women would increase because there would be fewer of them on the market. Men would then be placed in the position of competing for women instead of the other way around. They would be forced to become better men in order to attract a wife. Plain, infertile, and sickly women would still be able to marry because they don't have to try to be everything that a man needs. Polygamy among godly men can benefit both men and women.
I believe that there are at least two Scriptures which require polygamy among God's people and at least one which calls it a sign of repentance. The law of the levirate at times requires a man to accept a second wife, because it makes no exception for a man who is already married (Deu 25:5-10). Paul commanded younger widows to remarry, and commanded their fellow believers to accommodate them (specifically through financial support, but by implication through finding them a believing husband) (1 Tim 5:9-16), yet he also commanded them to not be unequally yoked with unbelievers (1 Cor 7:39, 2 Cor 6:14). The only way to obey both commands is for some men to marry more than one wife. Isaiah prophesied that in the last days, God's people will be overcome by war, foolishness, and feminism. The first sign of repentance will be when women humble themselves by submitting themselves to godly men who are already married. (Isa 4:1)
Polygamy (by which I mean polygyny and not polyandry or polyamory) is sometimes a very good idea, and sometimes it is necessary for obedience to God.
"If you love me, keep my commandments," Yeshua said.
Addendum: How many verifiably monogamous men are there in the Bible? (By monogamous, I mean according to their status, not their doctrine.) In the strictest sense, we can't verify that anyone in the Bible was monogamous, so lowering the bar to "probably monogamous", off the top of my head I can only think of six, although I’m sure there must be others:
- Adam
- Noah
- Shem
- Japheth
- Ham
- Zechariah (in the NT)
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